Cracks
by Elz Durden
Summary: I find myself in Purgatory, kidnapped by an insane angel. My companion claims to have started the apocalypse but the really crazy part is - I might be the only one that can save us. Not an OC. Just a twist. Slow updates.
1. Back in Black

Warning - this has spoilers for season seven finale. It centers on an OC. I had to. I just had to. This picks up right after the end of Season Seven. Two minutes after Cas leaves Dean, to be exact.

~.~

I was mid step on the hiking trail when my world ended.

My head _hurt_. With a capital 'cut it off please'.

That was all I had time to take stock of. Because after that, things were on fire. I must have misstepped, I must have stumbled off the side.

And I was falling. Possibly drowning.

Minus the water.

~.~

When I woke up, the first thing I noticed was that my head still hurt. It wasn't quite the demanding pain it had been prior but it was still enough that I wasn't in a hurry to move. Actually, I'd be pretty happy to just keep my eyes shut and lie still forever.

Only I was lying on something sharp and it was stabbing in to my hip with each breath. The ground I had landed on was about as forgiving as the business end of a knife. New aches were cropping up with each tiny twitch of my muscles and some of them were probably drawing blood.

I had a second to really, really debate on how badly I wanted to open my eyes. It seemed a daunting task. It wasn't like I had gone hiking alone. Any second now, my friends were going to come skirting down the ravine, gasping apologies and putting their cell phones to good use. And I could just keep laying here. An airlift on a backboard sounded awesome right now.

Except that pain in my hip was becoming insistent and my nose itched. I was a blink away from falling in to a nice deep coma and it was the itchy nose that finally got through to me and helped clear my head.

With a moan, I forced a weary eye open.

I focused on a dull colored rock closest to me. It was unremarkable under the light of the moon.

_Moon?_

That got my attention. With shaky arms and a head full of electric cotton balls, I managed to sit up and take in my surroundings. I was at the edge of a wooded area, one thick with overgrown roots that tangled through boulders like they were trying to drag them back in to the ground.

Despite the full moon, the sky was locked in twilight, an eerie glow hovering on the horizon as if the ground was burning. Not distant enough for my comfort, things were moving through the trees with alarming speed. Big things.

That was my cue to panic. I knew I shouldn't. That was what all those survivor shows preached, stay calm, be rational. Hold out till help came.

Thing was, the dark I could handle. Being lost in the woods I could deal with because sooner or later, someone _would _come. This was Pike's National forest for god's sake, not the Andes.

However, going hand to hand with a grizzly bear wasn't going to end well, panic be damned, so I might as well indulge.

A steady stream of 'oh my god's' had started bubbling out of my mouth, quite and tight to each breath. It didn't offer any comfort but the 'ohmygod' was the pressure valve on my emotions. If I didn't let a little of the panic out at a time, I was going to start screaming. Or worse, crying.

It didn't make any sense that help hadn't already came, but that didn't mean it wasn't coming. I needed to sit tight, not move and wait.

I couldn't remember if playing dead worked on bears or if that was a myth. Indecision was going to be the death of me. Either I needed to lie down right now and go limp or I needed to get running.

_Yeah cause my lazy ass is going to out run a bear._ This hiking trip had been the first time I had been out to the mountains since last spring. I wasn't like fat _fat_ but I wasn't delusional about what kind of shape I was in. I wasn't outrunning Yogi.

The 'ohmygod's' morphed in to a few quivering 'ok ok' and I started to try and bring my breathing under control. Maybe if I was really quiet, I'd be left alone.


	2. Speaking in Tongues

A firm hand landed squarely on my right shoulder. I had enough time for the absurd thought how immaculately clean the nails were before my feet gave out beneath me. Which was wrong, as I had been kneeling a second before.

The same strong hand steadied me, stopping me from stumbling face first in to the ground.

"Cas!" A harsh whisper, laced with relief caused my head to snap up, searching out the speaker.

"Yes?" I managed to cough out, speaking over a second voice that answered a deep, monotone 'yes' of it's own.

"Where have you been?" He was a rough looking man, with short hair and a wild look in his eyes.

"Lost-" I started, speaking over the other voice once again,

"I went -" The voice stopped.

So I tried again. "I was lost -"

"I went -" And apparently so did he.

"One at a time!" The man barked cutting us both off. The owner of the manicured nails stepped forward, exposing the broad back of an overcoat at me.

"I went to retrieve her." He said calmly as if he was commenting on the time.

"You went to get her? From where Cas? Last time I checked, we're in deep trouble here and you had time to go get…" He glanced over my clothing, "Backpack Barbie?"

"She's important." Cas countered, "She is a descendent from the Twelve Peers."

"And she came from where, the corner store…?" He asked, his tone incredulous.

"Pike's Peak." I chimed in, not willing to take a backseat to what was quickly becoming the craziest conversation I had ever heard.

"Pike's Peak?" He echoed, tone laced with sarcasm. "As in, _Colorado?_ Cas, if you can Dream of Jeanie out of here, now would be a _great_ time to get us the hell out of dodge."

"I can't Dean," He said, looking at Dean with an odd expression. "If I could, I would have by now. Every second we spend here is drastically reducing our chances of survival. The time it took me to find her has probably cost us the very minute advantage we gained by me pulling her in." Cas stopped, his eyes glancing down as he considered what he had just said, "Perhaps… perhaps it was a mistake to bring her at all then. I should have focused on finding a safe high ground to defend. I see that now."

"Cas!" Dean whispered harshly, "You've got to start making sense, man. We do not have time for crazy!"

Several growls trembled through the air and I looked towards the woods.

"Guys, there are eyes in the trees." I gasped, stepping closer to the two men. "Like, real, red glowing eyes…in the trees. Why are there eyes in the trees?" I demanded.

"No time." Cas said and quickly grabbed my shoulder and Deans in a mirror action.

The growls were gone. The trees were gone, just like that, vanished.

I spun around, trying to make my brain catch up to what my eyes was seeing. We were on a shoreline, a massive shoreline, churning against a sea so black I would have bet dollars to dimes that it wasn't water.

Like clockwork, the 'ohmygod's' started bubbling from my throat. That got a sideways glance from Cas but the other man, Dean just talked right over me, his voice rough, hardly containing his anger.

I watched as he brushed past me, grabbing the lapels of Cas's overcoat. "Ok Cas, game time. I need you here. Are you here with me?"

Cas wearily considered the man gripping him, "Yes Dean. I am very _here_ with you."

"Ok good, good." He lightly tapped a his palm against Cas's cheek in a sobering motion. "Now, please, in very clear, very sane words, explain to me why Backpack Barbie is here."

"Alright Dean. She's here because she's decedent from Twelve Peers. They alone can be called down in to Purgatory. There was a time when those of that bloodline policed the monsters of this realm. I believe you called them, 'Paladins' - humans of righteous light."

"You have got to be kidding me, she," Here he paused and made an encompassing wave in my direction, "Are you telling me Barbie is a GJ Joe for God?"

"Cassie." I blurted out before I could stop myself. "My name's Cassie."

"Fine," Dean said, turning back to the man he was inches away from shaking, "Cassie is a weapon?"

The man in the coat looked over at me, deep eyes considering me. "No, I don't believe so. Paladins were tempered in fire, the power of their souls an awesome light capable of purging the darkness of the worlds between. She," He titled his head, "Looks a little like a sparkler. All fizz and sizzle. It is unlikely she could repel a demon, let alone a horde of monsters and definitely not in their home."

Dean loosened his grip, taking a few deep breaths and muttering curse words that sounded vaguely latin. "Ok so, you can drag people down here, right? But not us out, right? So go grab a holy Rambo that has their batteries charged and get us the hell out of here."

"I can't, Dean. She is the last. And apparently the legendary power of the paladin was greatly exaggerated…you're upset."

"A little." He bit back, "Cause, see Cas, you just made a less than ideal situation much, much worse."

"I'm sorry Dean. I was trying to help. This has been a stressful day."

Dean just nodded grimly, taking a controlled step away from his companion. He glanced at me again, running a hand through his cropped hair.

"Can you fight?"

"Like bears?" I stuttered.

"Like monsters." He retorted.

"No so much." My voice had fallen to a muted whisper. Shock was sending my limbs shaking. The concussion I had given myself was probably so bad, I was on the edge of death, glimpsing the great beyond. Which turned out to be a world of darkness and crazy. I wanted to live so badly.

"Cassie." He said, voice close. I looked up at him. He had put a gentle hand on my shoulder, directing me away from my thoughts. "I need you to be brave right now, can you do that? I don't have time to explain but you need to trust me. Can you do that?"

I numbly shook my head 'no' but he continued on, ignoring me. "We're in a very, very bad place right now. Think of the worst thing that's ever happen to you and it's a freaking ice cream party compared what the stuff out there is going to do to you if we can't get out of here."

Tears started to flow freely down my face, littering my neck with water. See, that's what happens when I can't say 'ohmygod.' The crying seemed to soften Dean's expression but not a lot and not for long.

He turned back to Cas, who had in the meantime bent down to consider the ground around us. "Do you think there are bugs here Dean? Bugs that are eaten by monsters? There has to be a bug eating monster out there. Could be monster bugs maybe." His words trailed off, broken by an occasional chuckle.

Dean ran a hand down his face, looking from me crying and shaking to the man who was picking through rocks with a stick.

"We are so screwed." He muttered.


	3. Don't Fear the Reaper

It was oddly out of place, watching Dean sort through the items in my backpack. Call me crazy but it's surreal seeing your entertainment magazine being tossed on the ground of what I'm being told is Purgatory.

"What are you doing?" I asked, arms tucked tightly across my chest. I was all nerves and if there was so much as a loud noise right now, I was going to have a heart attack at the first loud noise but, hey at least I wasn't crying anymore. Points for me.

"Looking for weapons." He commented flatly, testing the edge of my pocket knife on his thumb.

"That thing won't cut butter." I offered. "I was just using it for the bottle opener."

Dean smiled tightly, tossing the knife on to a pile next to his knee. Seconds later, two bottles of water, one empty and one half full rolled their way on to it.

"Is that it?" He asked, flipping the bag over and giving it a shake for good measure. "You went hiking with two bottles of water and a People magazine? Really?"

I nodded, feeling a surge to defend myself and more than a touch embarrassed. "It was supposed to be a short hike. I didn't even really want to go."

"That's just my luck." Dean snatched up the empty bottle of water and tossed it towards Cas, who remarkably caught it despite having been throughly engaged his inspection of a rock.

"You, go make me some holy water."

"I don't believe that's water, Dean." Cas said, looking curiously towards the churning sea behind us. "I'm not sure what it is."

"Fine, go make me some holy sludge cause right now we got that and a whole lot of nothing. When those monsters come at us, they're getting a face full of nasty."

Just like that, Cas was gone without another word. Like in Bewitched, when Samantha blinks and suddenly her kitchen is clean, only it was a man and he was just…gone.

I felt a rash of 'ohmygod's coming on. Dean must have caught the look on my face because he walked up to me, putting a hand on each side of my face.

"Look at me." He commanded. "Cas is an angel and that's just the tip of the iceberg of crazy you just hit." I started to protest but the words wouldn't come. He rushed on, speaking over my stammer.

"Usually, that'd be my cue to explain to you about how the monsters are real and I'm the only thing standing between you and the bad thing under your bed but not today. I don't have time. So you just swallow down any panic attack you feel like having. Pack it down good and tight. And you hold it together. Or we are dead. Do you understand me?"

That was my cue to nod and finding myself at a loss for words, it was all I could manage.

"Good." He said with a half smile and a pat on my shoulder. "Once Cas gets back, we're moving. I have a plan."

"I hope it's a good one, Dean." Came a soft, female voice from behind us. "A really, really good one."

I spun around, my heart in my throat. The unshed tears I had been fighting scattered down my face. A woman, a sad woman was standing a few feet away, considering us.

Her long brown hair was tangled with dirt and leaves and she looked like she had been dragged behind a truck for the better part of a mile.

Before I could react, I had been shoved behind Dean, who lifted both his hands up in a pacifying manner towards the newcomer. "Lenore, please tell me you're not here for a snack."

Her eyes flickered from mine to Deans, "No, I'm not. I haven't fallen that far. Yet. Why does it not surprise me that you show up here with an angel and a paladin in toe?"

"How did you find us?" Dean asked, trying not to sound suspicious but not trying all that hard to hide that he clearly was. I took a step closer to Dean. Nothing he said made sense, on the other hand, if everything out there really was trying to kill us, I wasn't about to make myself an easy target.

"I followed my nose." She said simply, "You reek of blood." A shiver ran through her body and for a second, I thought a saw a flash of white edge over her bottom lip. If those were teeth, I was going to run screaming in the other direction.

Dean tensed in front of me.

"Relax Dean." Lenore said, "I'm not here to hurt you. I want to help, if I can. While I can."

Despite her words, Dean didn't relax and didn't move from his stance as a shield in front of me. I wasn't sure what the threat was. Then again, if a guy in a tan overcoat can be an angel, this housewife looking woman might be a mild-manner killer.

"Can you tell us how to get out of here?"

"There is no 'out' Dean." She said lowly. "Not anymore. Only in, in, in. Deeper and deeper until any shred of humanity you have left is bled out of you. Literally." She slowly started moving towards us as she spoke, her gaze demanding. "You can't imagine Dean. The very thing I fought to protect, the little spark of humanity I have left, it's made me a target. Me and all the others like me. We fight, we hide, we hope but for nothing."

"I'm sorry Lenore." Dean said, and he clearly meant it. "If there was anything I could do to help…"

"There is." She said with a bitter laugh. "The price on your head is enough to ensure my protection for all time. Very gutsy of you, coming here. There are so many monster's eager for your blood, all I would have to do is snatch you up for the highest bidder."

"I didn't exactly volunteer." He retorted.

"I know." And just like that, the bitterness was gone from her voice, washed away in sadness. Man she looked like a single mom running on too little sleep. "I know all about what you've done. All of us do." She said, nodding her head to indicate the world around her. "The Leviathans want you Dean. They want you and they are going to get you and when they do, you will wish you would have begged me to tear your throat out."

"Stay back." He cautioned, edging me back towards the water line. My heart was doing this neat trick of trying to escape from my chest. My ribs felt like they were breaking under all that frantic beating. Lenore looked at me then, full on. "Are you really a paladin?"

The hope in her eyes was heartbreaking. I couldn't lie to that. I was scared, in shock and shaky but I wasn't going to pretend I was something I wasn't.

"No." I forced out past clenched teeth.

"I didn't think so." She smiled, "Dean, your angel friend is only going to deter the weak. The foolish and the strong will come for you regardless. You need to run and hide. I'll try to buy you time."

"Why do this? Why help us?" I couldn't stop myself from asking, even though I immediately regretted it. I've never been awesome at biting my tongue, though lord knows I've had plenty of practice.

"I don't know what's going on," I tried to recover, "But if what he tells me is true and all that's out there is monster and things that want to eat us, why are you offering to help?"

"Hope." She shrugged. "You should go now. Orders are bring you in alive or leave you alone until the Leviathans reach you and they're already on their way."

"Come with us -" Dean started but mid-sentence a hand reached past my field of view, grabbing Dean by the shoulder, while another rested on mine.

"You talk too much." Cas's deep voice lectured and like that, we were gone.


	4. No One Like You

This time we landed high up, leaving the black ocean a dark smear on the horizon.

Cas caught Dean, who stumbled towards the ground, unconscious.

I scrambled away from the two men, turning to watch as the so called angel laid Dean down on a bare patch of dirt. He didn't make a move to get up. Just laid there, motionless in the shadows.

"Is he ok?" I asked, nervously. I had to admit I felt slightly more loyal to the man trying to save me than the one that had supposedly drug me down here.

"No. Neither are we. But right now, I made him sleep." Cas moved to stand next to the sleeping figure, arms straight to his sides, eyes scanning the area. He looked like a silent guard, alert, aware. Deadly.

"Pardon me for saying," I started in a hushed whisper, "but I don't think this is a great time for a nap." As if making my point, a deep throated howl cut through the deadly stillness.

"Lenore is making good on her promise. She's bought us some time. Dean will be more useful rested. He's better than most humans but even his body needs a few hours of rest every few days." As he spoke, his eyes never stopped sweeping the area.

"How long have you guys been here?" I asked, dazed.

"Not long. Forever maybe. A few minutes."

I glanced down at the ground. My mind racing. I had never been in a life in death situation before. The most I had ever been was panicked and I was familiar with my reaction in those cases. Crying or the ever present rambling of 'ohmygod.'

It would appear, under all that shock, there was a stage two. I was an accountant by trade and that number crunching, balance budgeting side of me was chopping at the bit to come out and play. I was kind of amazed that under the shaky, terrified exterior, I had a survivalist rational.

Problem one. "Why did you bring me here?" I asked, trying to infect my tone with the new found authority I was starting to feel.

Cas's eyes paused on my face before continuing their rounds. "You're here to help. Only you can't. You're not far enough over the rainbow." He stopped, pausing to chuckle. "Flying monkeys."

"You aren't all there, are you?" I asked, softening my tone. "Dean, he said you were an angel, are all angels like you?"

That sobered him up, the laughter fled his face. "There's no one left. I'm alone. Relatively speaking, yes, all angels are like me. There's only me…"

"I'm sorry." I said. It seemed terribly inadequate. When he didn't answer, I moved on to what I considered to be problem two.

"How did you guys end up here?"

Cas blinked at me, looking slightly bewildered. "The world was supposed to end. Only it didn't and that made it worse. I tired to fix it and like all would-be gods, the sun melted my wings."

I didn't have a response to that one. He tone had grown distant, slightly rambling.

"Paladins were humans with the power of angels. There was twelve of them. Their souls were super novas. They alone walked freely in to purgatory and with light undying, found those with a shred of a soul left and pulled them from the darkness.

I suppose my Father created them to balance to the Leviathans. Until one day, they left and all was silent."

"Where did they go?" I asked, edging towards him so I wouldn't miss his soft whispers over the sporadic howls and screams in the night around us.

He regarded me coldly, eye suddenly sharp with sanity. "We thought they had all died. The Leviathans knew about you and I took the knowledge from them. Little good that did me, you're no threat. You were a waste of effort." The sanity ebbed back, his eyes losing focus. "You're going to die too. Another lullaby."

I pulled back from him then. His words had ignited shivers that ran through my entire body, sending the tiny hairs on my arms to stand straight up. Out over the endless expanse of twilight darkness, shapeless shadows were roaming. By some miracle, they swerved away from our tiny share of the mountain top. Whether it was the angel's doing or Lenore's handiwork, I didn't know.

"Purgatory is the afterlife of what, all the monsters of the world?" I forced myself to ask. The silence between us was making me nervous.

"Not all. Only those that give in to their base instincts and take a human life. You would be amazed how few manage to escape that fate, however."

I thought about the sad house wife looking woman who against all odds was helping us. "What about Lenore?"

"Vampire." He confirmed in his monotone voice. "If you were a paladin, souls like hers would have cried out to you like a burning light. Your job would have been to take it out of here before all that humanity was ripped from her. Doesn't matter anymore. An eternity of running and dying only to have it start all over again will rob her of what's left of her soul. That's the fate of all of them, now. No hope."

"You're mad at me." I observed, catching the slight edge to his voice. "You act like that's my fault."

"Isn't it?" He asked, turning towards me. "Your ancestors left this place to rot and all the souls like Lenore's with it."

"That's not my fault." I stated blandly, looking away from his accusing stare. "Can't help who your parents are."

The laugh was a short bark that nearly caused me to have a heart attack. Cas was actually _laughing_ and I didn't have a clue why.

"Could you zap me to sleep or whatever it is you did him?" I asked not long after he finally stopped laughing. This was all too much to take in. Even a few minutes to let my mind restart would have been a blessing. Dean certainly looked peaceful.

"It wouldn't work on you." He answered. He must have caught the disappoint on my face, the tears in my eyes because then, he said in apologetic tones, "Paladins don't need to sleep, not here."

I nodded, not trusting my voice. I grabbed on tightly to that part of my mind that was rational, that was viewing all this at a distance with a calculated clarity, or I might lose it.

If I couldn't sleep, mediation was going to be my new best friend.

I walked over to the nearest tree, picking one that was within easy reach of the men that were both my captors and my only hope of escape.

I closed my eyes, taking deep, measured breaths and fought down all the raging emotions inside of me.

All the while trying to pretend that I didn't hear our guardian angel whispering madly to someone I couldn't see.


	5. What a Way to Go

True to his word, I never slept. Not really. I leaned up against that twist of a tree, thinking and later wishing desperately I could drop off in to the deep sleep Dean was enjoying.

The sounds of this place were impossible to block out, no matter how hard I tried. Howls, screams, growls, the occasional sharp crack of _something_ breaking, all these grated on my nerves. I thought I might end up joining the angel in his mental vacation if I had to sit there, listening. Maybe that's what had drove him mad to begin with. Maybe Heaven just a canopy of prayers, cries of ecstasy and moans of pleasure.

Yeah, I could see how an eternity of _that _ could drive angels insane.

He had been correct about time as well. I tried to count seconds in my head when I noticed my phone was a useless block of plastic but for some odd reason, I couldn't seem to keep track of time for more than a minute or two before it trailed off. It was like trying to keep time in a dream. I had never tried but if I had to guess it would be a similar wasted effort. Seeing as how I might never sleep again, I guess i couldn't really test it.

"Something's wrong."

started at the sound of the angel's deep voice and watched as he knelt down. With a soft brush of his fingers against his forehead, Dean came gasping awake.

"Did you zap me?" Were the first words out of his mouth and I had to smile. Something in his tone hinted that he had a history of forced naps.

"Dean, something's wrong."

Dean scrambled to his feet, righting the jacket he had been wearing. I felt flattered that his eyes roamed to me first, ensuring himself I wasn't missing. "What's up?" He asked, tone hushed.

"We haven't been attacked yet." The angel said in flat tones.

Dean blinked. "Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't that usually a good thing?"

"Yes well no. Not here. We should have been confronted by now. The vampire couldn't have lasted this long."

"Which means there's something else going on here." Dean finished for him, his eyes grim. "What, you think the kids got told we're off menu?"

Cas considered his words. "It's possible. There are several major demons and quite a few alphas that would demand a shot at us first. That's saying nothing about Eve."

I stood up, stretching my stiff legs as I ambled over to be included in the group. "Eve? As in 'Adam and-?"

"No." They answered together.

"Eve as in the mother of all monsters." Dean added. "I kind of killed her. I can see how that might make us purgatory's most wanted."

I swallowed hard. These guys knew how to pick fights. "What do we do?" I asked. "We can't wait here for the big badies to come after us, right?"

Dean shared a look with Cas before reconsidering me with a glance. "When did you join team awesome? I thought you were going to sit around crying until something made a snack out of you."

"I thought I might too but seems my sense of self preservation is making a believer out of me. If you say there's bad things out there, I believe you. If you say you guys have a snow balls chance in getting us out of here, than I believe that too. I don't want to just sit here like a red shirt waiting to prove how serious things are by dying."

I was surprised when Dean laughed. Not many people got my Star Trek jokes and I would have bet good money that Dean wouldn't have been one of them. Surprise, surprise.

"Ok then." He nodded agreeably. "Welcome to the club. Ok," He clapped his hands in readiness. "First things first, we have to get mov-"

Before I even realized what was happening, Cas had grabbed us both by the shoulders and we were now in some sort of flat clearing.

'-ing." Dean finished with a grimace. "I hate that, I really do."

"Sorry." Cas said, sounding anything but apologetic.

"How many times can you do that?" I asked, turning towards the angel.

"Indefinitely." He responded. "I need only a small recovery each time."

"Well that's something." I said, surveying the area around us. We seemed to be in a valley of sorts. Only the mountains were bone white and the sky was roiling with thick dark clouds.

"Plan." Dean exclaimed. "Sam's a smart guy. He has to know what happened to us by now. If you," He motioned towards Cas, "Were able to open purgatory once, Sam can figure it out. He'll summon you and when you get that call, you pop us right out of here with you."

"That is a good plan." Cas answered, looking to the ground, with a sad expression. "I didn't want to mention it before because, well, it's a bummer - but time passes here like it does in Hell. It could be several years in our time before Sam even realizes what's happened to us.

Not to mention the time it would take to gather those materials. It wasn't easy Dean, even for me." For a second, I thought Cas might start crying and I was utterly floored when he actually did. A child-like look of guilt rushed over his features, making him look more like a ten year old with a skinned knee than a heavenly warrior. Without warning, he embraced Dean in a tight hug.

"Shh, it's ok Dean, it's ok. Let it out. Brave solider." He hushed, sobbing in to Dean's coat.

Dean gave me a pleading look over Cas's shoulder and mouthed 'help' as he awkwardly patted the man on the back. Unsure how to assist, I moved forward and rested a hand lightly on the tan colored coat.

There as a shock of bright light, tiny but intense from where my fingers had made contact with his back.

I blinked rapidly as I pulled my hand away, trying to clear the after vision of the brightness from my eyes. I wasn't sure if anyone else had noticed, it had happened so fast, like a spark of static electricity - only on crack.

"What was that?" Demanded Dean, freeing himself from the arms of the angel.

I guess he had noticed.

"A hug." Cas sniffed, snuffling away from his companion looking sullen. "You carry so much weight on your shoulders. You brave, sad man." His lower lip trembled as he spoke. "Like a monkey that's lost it's forest."

"No not that." Dean retorted, brushing away from Cas as he took a step towards me.

I quickly hid the offending hand behind me, feeling just as shocked as I'm sure I looked. He wasn't deterred, he snatched my hand back, careful to grab it by the wrist. The friendly look in his eyes had been replaced by suspicion.

"I thought you said you weren't a paladin."

"I'm not!" I said, confused. "That's never happened before! I think I would have noticed my rainbow bright powers before now if they existed."

"Is that so?" He asked, clearly not convinced. "You won't mind a test then?" And like that, he slammed my hand against the side of Cas's face.

Now, I've been in pain before. I've had my wisdom teeth removed. I dislocated a knee. When Cas pulled me down here, I was pretty sure every bone in my body was broken.

That _paled_ in comparison to the burst of white lightening that was running through my body the moment my hand connected with Cas's unshaven cheek.

I was a star burning up in the atmosphere. I was fuel. Fleeting and brief.

I was _burning_.


	6. Hell's Bells

Made a happy change to this. There is no longer an OC. Just an awesome twist. Cause when it struck me, it was simply brilliant.

…

I struggled to pull my hand away from the burning. Touching my hand to a live wire didn't have anything compared to this. Through all the brightness and the pain, I tried to gain some sense of order but it was all noise.

Only…

There was a man, standing out of focus. His voice was clear and close, whispering against my inner ear.

"Are you trying to purge _me?_." The voice asked in a soft purr. "Why, you're nothing. You already knew that, didn't you? All the time growing up, feeling like you were different. The outcast. And you were right, you were different. Here was your big chance to prove it too. Make something of yourself."

There's a smell now. It's cloyingly sweet with sharp undertones of rot. My head starts to spin from it and I wish I could quit breathing. It's a taste that's also a bad touch. A smell so assaulting it burns it's way on to my mind, picking through my memories until it uncovers the word it wants.

_Evil._

Now the man sighs dramatically, with sarcasm "You failed though. Big shock, right? Poor little thing. Only to fail again!"

"I'm dreaming." I said, trying to shake off the growing horror. If this was a nightmare, I got the feeling I needed to wake up right now. Bad things were about to happen. To me.

The man crossed his arms, a blur of motion, taking on a thoughtful pose. "I'll tell you what. I don't want you to go away empty handed so I'm going to let you try to get rid of me. Here you go."

His hand raised out towards me. Every fiber of my being was screaming **WAKE UP** but I couldn't and I didn't.

A black stream of thick smoke lunged at me, eager and deadly. As it surrounded me, images, terrible images flashed by at an alarming rate. Quicker and quicker, blotting out my already abused senses. I tried to close my eyes, to look away, but I couldn't. The smoke was everywhere.

It was slipping through every pore, drowning every sense. My mind couldn't understand what I was seeing. No horror movie came close, no disaster, no tragedy. It was just a numbing, all consuming evil.

~.~

I've had this feeling before. The one where I wake up in the dead of the night, fully alert. You have a second to wonder why you're awake before a sharp pain lurches in your stomach. Then there's that fleeting heartbeat as you try to make a mad dash to the bathroom. Most the time, I make it. Some of the time I don't and I cover the hallway in sick and regret.

Those are the night I usually had chinese food for dinner.

Times that by a solid five and that's how I feel as I roll on to my knees. I'm sure I'm awake now because what happens next is all too real and embarrassing to be imagined.

I start puling a scene from the Exorcist. Only it's not pea soup. It's thick, black tar that smells of sulfur and decay. I'm startled and horrified but I can't stop. it's just comes and comes and I can't get it out of me fast enough.

"Cas!" I hear Dean call. "What's happening to her?"

A thoughtful and slightly guilty voice comes from near my left. "She's purging. Paladins can burn evil out of the dead or they can filter it it out of the living. That's what evil looks like when it's infected a living soul."

"Evil looks like the insides of a dirty diaper?" I could hear the snicker in his voice.

"Lovely." I manage to cough out before I'm sick again. Never again, I silently swear between gulps of breath. No wonder the paladins all went AWOL. If their superpower was puking evil, they had every right to vanish in to the sidelines.

"Nope. Nope, I'm done." I cough as I move to stand on shaky legs, wiping my mouth. There's no water to rinse with, just the dodgy looking lake water Cas holy-ed. I seriously consider if it could possibly taste worse than what's in my mouth now.

More hands on my shoulders and I'm being helped up, moved away from the mess I made on the hillside. Dean looks apologetic. "Look, about pushing you in to Cas like that."

"Nope nope." I stop him right there, moving out of his helpful grip. "We aren't going to talk about that anymore. I would very _very_ much like to talk about anything else. Please." Try as I might, the man's voice is memory burned in to my mind. I need distance from it. Ideally out of this hellish place too but that doesn't seem to be happening any time soon.

"You sound different." Dean remarked, regarding me with tired interest. "Why do you sound different?"

"How in the world do I sound different?"

"I dunno." He muttered, brows furling.

"Ok, really helpful Dean." My mind was a tangled mess of emotions, all of them bad and some of them down right toxic. Oddly enough, gone was the fear and uncertainly. All that was left was a burning desire to get the hell out of here at whatever cost. The footsteps next to me stopped. I turned to see Dean fixing a demanding look at Cas, who now appeared sane enough to try and not make eye contact.

"Where are you from?" He asked. It took me a second to realize the question was directed at me.

I looked from Cas to Dean, sure I was missing something but answered anyway. "Nebraska."

My answer seemed to upset Dean more than pacify him. "Nebraska. Right. Go hiking a lot?"

Ok now I was getting sick of playing twenty questions. "Do I need to remind ya'll that we're being hunted?"

"Answer the question." Dean shot back.

"No! Ok you happy? I have never, ever been hiking. I don't hike. Now can we please find some high ground? I am feeling horribly exposed out here. That dead lady is only going to buy us so much time."

"You have an accent." Dean answered. He didn't seemed phased by the anger I was throwing out in Aces.

"Of course I do."

"You didn't before." He pointed out. "You said you were hiking on Pike's Peak, which is in Colorado, not Nebraska." There was a tone in his voice. A sharp tone of someone that was used to being lied to but could still find a way to be hurt by it.

"I wasn't hiking." I answered back flatly. "I think I should know."

"Right." Dean said with a mocking shake of his head. Before anyone could react, he whipped a hand out and grabbed Cas's long coat. The angel looked like a dog that had been caught eating the Christmas ham. The kind of guilty reflected in every inch of his body.

Which got me thinking. Why had I said I was hiking in Pike's Peak? I could remember saying it, but it was such a thoughtless lie. A stupid lie. I had traveled around a lot, sure, but not there and the few times I went to Colorado - it sure the hell hadn't been for pleasure. It had been for…

"They're gone." I muttered softly. In that old familiar place where my memories were stored, there was a big vacant sign. "I can't remember."

"What did you do to her Cas?"

I felt I was very much vested in that answer. And I very much wanted to hear it. However, my luck being what it was, I didn't get the chance to hear the angel muttering his reply.

A big, meaty hand clamped down on my shoulder, digging in to it with a desperate grip that tore in to my skin.

"Gotcha." Hissed the owner of the hand. A deep baritone, tinged with an unnatural edge. "You guys are dumb, you know that? All of this hell bent place is after you and you stand around arguing. I don't know why, but I expected more from you, Dean." The dark voice had a manic cheerfulness to it. "Long time, Dean."

"Are you kidding me?" Dean asked, letting go of the angel and sighing. "Gordon - of course, sure why not."

"I'm touched you remember." The man shot back. "Seeing as you're evil son of a bitch brother decapitated me."

"You were a vamp, Gordon, remember?" Dean retorted, starting to walk slowly towards me and the undead stink holding me. I kept still, very still, forcing my heart to calm. I wanted the vamp's attention focused on anything but me and at the moment, Gordon seemed happy to oblige. My fingers twitched, missing the feel of something I couldn't remember but an object who's loss felt like the loss of a limb. It was deep, muscle memory. I knew exactly what I needed to do but not why.

"We kill vamps." Dean continued, "I thought you'd be happy to be taken out, considering."

Gordon snarled, fingers digging deeper in to my shoulder. I could feel the first trickle of blood starting to run down under my shirt. _Just another second.._ I forced myself to remain still. _Almost there._

"Not fast enough!" The vampire shouted back, "You should have killed me before…before." The anger seemed to deflate from his voice, replaced by a sick remorse. "I've killed, Dean. I killed my friend." Dean must have made some threatening move because Gordon wrapped his other arm around my neck, locking it in the bend of his elbow. "When I heard you were down here, I have to admit, the thought of tearing you apart drove me nearly mad. But…I didn't do it. And I've been killing any monster fool enough to try. Buying you idiots enough time to run and instead you waste it pissing around."

"You've been buying us time?" Dean asked, voice sharp, "Why? I'm touched and all but you were hardly that human even when you were human."

"Her." He answered giving me a meaningful shake. "I heard that freak over there talking about how she's the ticket out of this place. I want out Dean. I want it more than I want you dead."

With that, the vampire started taking steps back, forcing me along with him by the grip on my neck. "I'm taking her and we're leaving, you understand? No hard feelings - except, there are. There are all kinds of monsters out there dying for a reunion with the great 'Dean Winchester'."

"Don't I get a say in this?" I choked out, desperately trying to dig my feet in to the uneven ground.

"No." He barked back.

"Ass." I muttered under my breath. I really only had one option, use that horrible right hand of mine and try to purge him. The thought of it made me sick. Literally, I could feel my stomach rolling. I did not want to go through that again.

I didn't have time to think about it too long.

Something wet and extremely foul smelling splashed on me and in that same instant, Gordon lost his hold on me with a scream. I could smell flesh burning as I tried to blink the stinging liquid from my eyes. A warm hand grabbed mine, pulling me through the darkness as I stumbled to keep my footing.

"Dean!" I screamed blindly. "Please tell me you did not just dose me with that lake water?!"

"A little." He responded from in front of me, pulling me along urgently away from the vampire screams.

I couldn't tell how long we ran, only that my legs were screaming at me to stop. By the time we slowed down, the sludge from the lake had caked on to my skin, streaking it with lines of black oil that smelled so bad I didn't think I'd ever come clean.


End file.
